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The Basics of Adoption
What is Adoption?
Adoption is the legal act of permanently transferring your (biological) parental responsibilities and rights to your infant/child and placing them onto adoptive parents. Adoption laws vary from state to state so you will need to find out what the laws are in your state.
What is the law in Maryland?
At anytime during the pregnancy you and the mother of your child, also known as the birthmother, can start to make an adoption plan. However, signing legal papers terminating your parental rights cannot be done until after the baby is born. After that, you have up to 30 days to change your mind before it becomes legally binding.
What are my rights as the father?
As the birthfather you have the right to:
- Be notified that the birthmother is making plans to place your child for adoption.
- Be involved in the adoption process.
- Refuse to allow the adoption to take place.
Do I need an attorney or any money?
If you and the birthmother work with an adoption agency you do not need an attorney or money. The agency will handle all the legal and financial details. However, if you do not use an adoption agency, you will need to hire an attorney.
Can I choose the family for my baby?
Yes, you and the birthmother can choose the couple or family that you want to be the parents for your child. The adoption agency you select will discuss all of your options with you.
Will I get to see my child if my child is adopted?
The choice is yours. There are three basic types of adoption: open, semi-open or closed. Each adoption plan allows for different levels of contact between the birthparents, adopted child, and adoptive family. In an open adoption, for example, you can meet the adoptive family, write a letter to your child explaining your thoughts and feelings, and give a gift to your child. You can request photographs of your child be sent to you. The amount of contact you have after the baby is placed with a family depends on your wishes and is agreed upon in advance by the adoptive parents.
Will my child know anything about me?
Your counselor asks for a complete medical and social history of you and your family. It is very important that your child know as much as possible about you. Your life story is a great gift to your child.
If adopted, won't my child wonder if I ever loved him or her?
Your child may have questions similar to this one. That's why it's so important to communicate your love through a personal letter, explaining that planning an adoption was a painful decision for you — a real sacrifice.
How can I be sure my child will be cared for?
Adoption agencies must screen and approve all adoptive families. Information required includes medical, financial and criminal background checks. Prior to finalizing the adoption, a caseworker will make home visits to ensure your child's well being. If you select an open adoption, you may be able to see for yourself how well your child is cared for and loved.
Where can I go for help?
The Shady Grove Pregnancy Center has trained pregnancy counselors on hand who are available to provide preliminary information on adoption. However, if you decide on adoption, you will need an adoption agency.
Excerpted from "10 Questions Most Birthfathers Ask," Bethany Christian Services, 2005.
